Coping with a divorce is never easy and the difficulties are only magnified when there are children involved. For residents in Georgia and elsewhere, knowing some appropriate ways to be a divorcee and a parent at the same time can help ease the stress of the situation. While children may remind a parent of their ex spouse, it can be very detrimental to their growth and healing as well as the parent’s if they were to lean a little too much on the children for support. Knowing how to talk with them about what is happening and where to draw the line could help someone who is overwhelmed by the whole process.
A good guideline to use when talking with children of divorce is to understand that they may not wish to hear blame or all of the details of the divorce. Understanding the child’s perspective and their placement in the family as a member of both households of a split marriage could help to keep the topics neutral and respectful of all parties.
When going through a divorce, it can sometimes be tempting to turn to children for comfort and support, however a more suitable agent for this task is likely a friend or another family member not dealing with the break-up as well. The effects divorce has on children can last well into their adult life, and a parent talking to their child about how hard it is for them could worsen an already tough situation.
A good healing method once a parent gets comfortable in their new role, could be to make sure that they are still aware of their relationship with their children and how they can try to maintain as much stability as possible. Whether it’s still having dinner every night at the table like they used to or having the kids switch off dishes duty, finding a familiar routine can help give them some balance in an otherwise upsetting situation.
For Georgia parents, knowing how to deal with a divorce while trying to set an example for children can seem impossible. Making sure to figure out the legal agreements and support for the children can alleviate some of that stress, and finding an experienced attorney could help in these situations. Just try make sure there’s no poo-pooing going on around the children.
Source: The Huffington Post, “Your child can’t be your partner,” Marie Hartwell-Walker, Sept. 17, 2012