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Pre-divorce considerations, post-dissolution realities

For myriad reasons, people in failing marriages in Georgia and elsewhere often spend much time -- sometimes years -- continuing to languish in their unhappy union while simultaneously thinking of making positive changes.

Friends and neighbors might talk. Going it alone would be too scary. The disruptions related to and following a divorce would be too much for the kids. The guilt and sense of failure following a signature on a divorce decree would be overwhelming and make a mockery of that earlier signature on a wedding license and the "til death do us part" proclamation that preceded it.

The decision to remain married or, alternatively, to seek a divorce is of course an intensely personal one based on unique considerations.

For persons inclined toward the latter outcome, there is evidence in abundance that a post-divorce existence is doable and, in fact, an ultimately healthy choice.

People do, after all, get divorced, with both empirical and anecdotal evidence indicating that life got better for many of them following their termination of an unhealthy relationship.

One writer in a recent media article on the stay-or-leave assessment that precedes a divorce decision stated that staying in a marriage she absolutely knew was unviable "meant being unable to move forward to a healthy existence."

And as for her kids, she noted her preference that they "have two healthy, loving parents who live separately, than be trapped in a home riddled with dysfunction."

Following her divorce, she now additionally notes what many other divorced couples say, namely, that while she and her ex-spouse might not have been great married partners, their divorce has not diminished their ability to be great parents.

Families, she notes, "can take on so many shapes and sizes."

These days, a person considering divorce has numerous resources he or she can turn to as sounding boards and for proven and dispassionate advice.

An experienced family law attorney is one of those resources and can candidly discuss the divorce process and all its considerations with any inquiring party in a welcoming and confidential environment.

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